Recent Oasis reunion rumours rank pretty highly when compared to the history of Oasis reunion rumours.

For starters, Beady Eye have disbanded. Now that Liam Gallagher has completely shaken off the “new project” shackles (to Oasis purebreds at least), its finally time to reunite with brother slash nemesis Noel Gallagher and recreate all that Oasis magic. A well placed source also claims all plans are in place for a reunion. Couple that with Paul McCartney joining in the speculation and you get a “Definitely Maybe”.

Oh, oh, and there’s no smoke without fire, right?

The truth is, it has never been this likely. And yet word from the Gallaghers’ camps suggest otherwise. Considering the heavy influence The Beatles’ music have had on Oasis, you’d expect McCartney’s words to bear some weight in the least. At the same time, their refusal to reunite in the face of a Beatle’s request reflects on the sheer animosity that the brothers share.

With their superstardom in mind, it was always expected from the day they broke up that this trickle of Oasis reunion narratives will one day become an inundation. And already, the slew of rumours surrounding this very narrative seems unreliable and disappointing.

Unreliable because, with all excitement considered, hearing news of a possible Oasis reunion and discovering the truth behind it is starting to feel like the equivalent of opening presents on your birthday and receiving socks. Black dress socks.

Disappointing because, just as these rumours start to pick up speed, each of the Gallagher brothers refutes it just as quickly. Noel does it this time, claiming that it all came from Liam’s camp. And so we start to strike these sources off our list of Credible Oasis Reunion Sources To Believe, all at the same time getting the rug pulled out from under our feet.

Blur Releasing An Album After a Decade

If fellow Brit rock pioneer Blur can rise out of the dead and release a full-length album after over a decade of hiatus, surely anything else is possible. Oh wait, they already did.

Your move, Oasis.

Zayn Malik Returning to One Direction

Wait, what do Zayn Malik or One Direction have anything to do with Oasis? Well, there is more that connects One Direction and Oasis. And no, it’s not that both groups are British.

It appears that the focal point of the Gallagher’s most recent feud is One Direction. For those unfamiliar with Oasis tiffs, this is as textbook as it gets. While Noel waxes lyrical about the demise of modern music and One Direction, Liam slags off his brother’s opinion on Twitter. It doesn’t matter who’s right, because by the time the brothers resolve their differences, we’re pretty sure Zayn Malik would have one-upped them by returning to One Direction.

Oasis Reunion Without the Gallagher Brothers

Now, we know how blasphemous this entire idea sounds. We’re familiar with the rules too – no Gallaghers, no Oasis, right?

It’s as if the whole world bar the Gallagher brothers are keen for an Oasis reunion. Ironic, considering the gift of duality that Noel and Liam are blessed with. The rest of the band have even put their cards on the table. Former Oasis bassist Andy Bell has even gone as far as saying that an Oasis reunion “probably should happen at some point”. It’s starting to feel like an old British race car raring to go – engines revving – only stalled by the Gallaghers’ handbrakes.

John Lennon Coming Back From the Dead and Getting Oasis To Reunite

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From Left: Liam Gallagher, John Lennon

Now, look. With Paul McCartney campaigning for Oasis reunion, this is as good as it gets right?

Wrong. Who better than John Lennon to convince self proclaimed John Lennon 1.2 a.k.a Liam Gallagher and his brother to set their differences aside and make music again?! Of course we know this isn’t going to happen.

So no comeback then? Okay.

Featured images from Shejken.