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“Once a cheater, always a cheater,” as the saying goes. How true is this exactly? Numerous studies have been conducted on the psychologies of partners when they cheat. Do they do it for the thrill, out of boredom, or out of a lack of love? Whatever it is, we can all at least agree that we can most certainly do with one less potential problem to worry about.
Should this part of your partner’s history ever surface, here are 3 ways in which you might possibly want to respond:
1. Freak out and run
No one wants to end up in a position where they realised that they saw the bullet coming, only to decide not to dodge it, whether out of some death wish or a simple faith in the impossible. If you’re not someone who handles insecurities well, no amount of promises or convincing will be able to help you to sleep at night. If your first reaction to this piece of new was your heart folding in on itself, it’s probably a good idea that you call it quits.
2. Stay the course
Relationships are about commitment, and this commitment entails acceptance of the fact that everyone comes to a relationship with emotional baggage. Sure, this isn’t exactly a problem every couple has to deal with. But it happens. Some people have diet restrictions, others have made mistakes in the past. Hunker down, accept the risk and move on. No need to make a big deal out of it.
3. Listen, listen, listen
This is probably the most obvious course of action to take, though in light of such revelations, the above 2 possibilities can become very real. People cheat for different reasons, and sometimes, it doesn’t happen in a moment of complete emotional clarity. It should be your responsibility to at least hear your partner out, their reasons and then decide from there if the risk is worth it. Regardless of what the word on the street is, people do change.
Living with something like that over your head is the last thing anyone needs. At the same time, it’s important that partners do their parts to help each other not repeat their mistakes. On finding out why that incident happened, it’s now part of your commitment to each other to make sure such things don’t become possible again. Don’t let a good thing slip away just like that.